Antoinette

Before we found our sweet apartment in Quincy, we saw a real gem in JP. “You shovel?” asks Antoinette, the over-sassed, lunatic landlady. She continues to challenge my boyfriend. “I want somebody out here in the winter.” Here’s her other query: “You guys smoke?” “No,” we reply truthfully — thinking that’s what she wants to hear from prospective tenants. “Oh, well sometimes my brother is here and he smokes. So I don’t want any complaints about the smoke,” she says, all while waving a magenta acrylic nail at us. I wait a beat. “So does your brother smoke cigarettes or crack?” I ask. Yep. That shut her up. And just like, we walked out the door and she was out of our lives forever.